Monday, July 15, 2013

I noticed yesterday that daily activities went better than much of the last time.. The harassment the last days was not so hard I thought which is probably right. There may be also letting go of my mind. There seem to have been control which kept me down rather often I was down. I do not know how such could be possible. Through monitoring of my mind with being able to interfere at any time?
.This sexual harassment especially which I have had now for many years drives me regularly into a burnout, For me this means being much less active than without it.. This burnout made me passive for hours every day and depressive the rest. I could not made up my mind easily, could not concentrate long, weak mental performance. I did not much often shied away from simple tasks. It affected my body. I was just weak in sports.
Meditation was able to get me out of such quiet often. But gang stalking and MC were able to reduce my meditation practice. To get out of a burnout I need a lot of meditation with several hours every day for weeks but with sexual harassment I am into one again quickly.

I noticed today asleep no sexual harassment after I had a talk in my head before and it was noticed in this talk that this harassment gets me down. Could it mean that the harassers are more positive about me now. Maybe. I had also some comments which may be seen as helpful. My learning English regularly has to do with it. I heard that I could be now be seen more as a normalo.

I read in the TAZ an article about the ultrarunner. There is a ultramarathon in California. 217 km much through the desert.

http://www.taz.de/Ultramarathon-in-Kalifornien/!119775/

They wrote that some runners can't sleep after the run with pain.

I had it regularly that I had too much pain to go to sleep again after sexual harassment during sleep.

Despite not having sexual harassment I feel mentally in a mess. Having to do with the voices, the harassment my life leaves me with too many issues which need attention

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